Attack of the Monkeys in the News

The Internet is a strange place

The software we use to run LST has a feature that shows us the last 10 or so incoming links that others have made to our site. Fairly frequently, out of ego gratification a sense of scientific curiosity I will follow the links to see who, exactly, is linking to us.

Which is how I came across Attack of the Monkeys, a blog devoted entirely to a single post by Jeremy Weidenhof last March on the subject of… attacking monkeys. The text is a verbatim transcript of this post by Jeremy. The picture used is the same. There is not a single post on any other subject. The “author profile” is that of a monkey. There is a sound clip of a monkey making monkey noises.

So someone out there has either become so infatuated with Jeremy’s post that they decided to create an entire blog devoted only to it, or they’ve written a computer program that takes posts on LST and automatically generates new blogs devoted to each individual one.

I’m not certain which possibility I find more disturbing.

by David Benzion [via lonestartimes.com]

Monkeys on the Attack in India

NEW DELHI, India— A top court reprimanded authorities in the Indian capital for failing to stop hundreds of monkeys from terrifying residents, news reports said Thursday.

As forest cover around New Delhi has shrunk, the city has struggled with a growing simian population. Government buildings, temples and many residential neighborhoods are overrun by hundreds of Rhesus macaques. The animals will occasionally snatch food from unsuspecting passers-by and even bite them.

“If you can’t control the monkeys, what can you do?” the Delhi High Court acerbically asked representatives of the various municipal authorities in a ruling responding to a petition filed by the harassed residents of a posh residential neighborhood. The court asked authorities to explain “what measures were being formulated to find a permanent solution to the monkey menace in the capital.”

City authorities weren’t immediately available for comment.

Over the years city authorities have tried various methods to deal with the problem. They’ve used monkey catchers who use langurs — a larger and fiercer kind of simian — to scare or catch the monkeys.

In 2002 the court asked that wildlife and municipal officials take measures to make sure that the problem was eradicated or at least significantly minimized, but the problem has persisted.

Earlier this year the country’s Supreme Court ordered wildlife authorities to transport some 300 macaques from New Delhi to the dense jungles of Madhya Pradesh state. The government of that state was to receive $54,000 from the federal government to cover the cost of reintroducing the monkeys to the wild,

Other efforts by animal welfare agencies have been defeated, in part, by Hindus who believe that monkeys are manifestations of the monkey god Hanuman. The animals are often fed bananas and peanuts, which encourages them to frequent public places.

[via cnews.canoe.ca]

Killer Monkey Attack Part I

Part II


Part III

2 Monkeys Confiscated at Sofia Airport

SOFIA, Bulgaria - Customs officers at Sofia airport have confiscated two monkeys as they were about to be taken out of the country. The papers of the animals weren't in order, as the necessary certificates by the Environment Ministry were missing, BNR reported. The monkeys were placed under quarantine in the rescue centre of Sofia Zoo. Once the quarantine period is up, they will be placed in the zoo, together with others of their kind...read more »

by Sofia News Agency
http://www.novinite.com/view_news.php?id=73239

SWAT Monkey

ARIZONA, USA - "News” from Arizona that the Mesa Police Department is seeking some specialized assistance in the form of a “SWAT Monkey.” Before you laugh too hard, the department has actually submitted a grant proposal to the federal government for $100,000 to fund the purchase, outfitting and training of a capuchin monkey for the Mesa SWAT team.

The “vision”:
Weighing only 3 to 8 pounds with tiny humanlike hands and puzzle-solving skills, Truelove said it could unlock doors, search buildings, and find suicide victims on command. Dressed in a Kevlar vest, video camera, and two-way radio, the small monkey would be able to get into places no officer or robot could go.

A question presents itself: Why would a monkey need a two-way radio?
“Mr. Chips, go find the suicide victim!”
“Oooooh Oooooooh Aaaaaaaah Aaaaaaaah!”

It has been over a year since the grant application was filed, and Officer Truelove is anxiously awaiting a response. If the grant goes through, Truelove plans on learning how to train the monkey himself and keeping the sociable monkey at home, just like a K-9 officer would.
Nothing warms the heart like a man and his monkey.

by Jeremy Weidenhof [via lonestartimes.com]

When Love Monkeys Attack

SOUTHWEST, China - Straight off the zoo wire, news from China reveals that pandas are not the only ones with trouble in the jungle bedroom. Rhesus monkeys in a Chinese park attract several million tourists each year, but the male monkeys are having trouble attracting mates.

There are far more males than females at the park in southwest China and the extra "lonely heart" males become aggressive, attacking people. Seventy-two tourists were assaulted by rhesus monkeys at the park in 2003, and park authorities had to pay more than 12,500 yuan (US$1,562) in medical costs. In 2004, 253 people were injured, costing the park 40,000 yuan. In 2005, 505 people were hurt by the monkeys, resulting in 84,000 yuan in medical expenses...read more »

by Jeremy Weidenhof
http://lonestartimes.com/2006/03/15/when-love-monkeys-attack/